I learned a very valuable lesson this week. The light bulb turned on for me.... :)
It is okay to show weakness. I know this isn't the most profound statement ever, but sometimes we need to admit to being human. I realized that I try to absorb and fix every single problem that comes my way. Instead of yelling "HELP!," I bite my lip, roll up my sleeves, and try to do everything myself. I go to the point of breaking, possibly a little broken, keep going, then explode with such an intense flame that it affects everyone around me to the point of being hurtful at times. (I truly apologize if it happened to be you).
So last week I asked for a day off work; to catch up on bills, grocery shopping, and cleaning the house which was an absolute wreck. Not typical of me. I can't remember the last day I took off except for Thanksgiving and Christmas. And when my wonderful boss said yes, I couldn't help feeling guilty. Why? I honestly don't know. I seem to self-inflict guilt on myself if I let anyone down. If I say no to hanging out with someone, I feel guilty. If I am not constantly being productive with my time, I feel guilty. It is hard for me to take a break and just relax.
So, that being said, I am trying to train my mind to understand that I can't be everything for everyone, although I feel I try hard to do so. Some days I will have to say no and realize my own boundaries.
And more importantly, recognize that we weren't designed or created to take all of life's problems, drama, & difficulties by ourselves when Jesus is right there beside us wanting to lift the burden off our shoulders and instill peace in us. Thank God He is bigger than any situation, trouble, or issue I come across in this crazy thing called life. My trust needs to be in Him at all times regardless of any circumstance.
"You will keep in perfect peace those whose minds are steadfast, because they trust in you. " Isaiah 26:3
Perfect peace? Shit. I don't think I have ever been in perfect peace, but I am trying to trust God even when my small mind can't see a reason to.
Homemade lasagna always tastes best, no matter what. Although there are some amazing restaurants out there that my offer their version of lasagna, for me, it needs to be homemade.
I have searched high and low for a good lasagna recipe and have not come across one that satisfies my taste buds. My biggest problem with the recipes I have found: there is never enough sauce! Who wants dry lasagna that is just noodles? No. It needs to be bubbling over with flavorful sauce and cheesy goodness.
So, last night, I decided to conquer this dish; throw out the cookbook and try my own version. The result: Success! It "passed" my husbands approval and our friend that came over.
I used italian sausage because the flavor it gives is incredible, probably twice the amount of sauce you find in any other recipe, and both ricotta and cottage cheese. Usually recipes call for one or the other, but ricotta is too dry for me to use on its own, and cottage cheese is too chunky on its own. So I mixed 'em!
When I am creating a new recipe, it is usually either a disaster or a success. In this case, it was a keeper. Here is the recipe, I hope you enjoy! Gabbi's Lasagna
What does it mean to be a strong woman? For some reason I was thinking about this as I drove home from work tonight. When I think of a strong woman, I do not think of overbearing, loud, demanding, proud, or even "independent" as today's society is so eager to strive for. I think of the little old lady that comes into my office with wrinkles painting her face who reaches over to give her husband a kiss after 50 plus years together.
I think of a gentle, quiet countenance that serves her family every day with a smile instead of a frown. I think of a willingness to help her husband be the man he was created to be, by simply allowing him to be the head of the home, or just letting him know you support and respect his decisions. I think of a home that is clean and in order, where you know there is peace, because this woman works hard every day for it.
A strong woman puts others first at times, especially her family. She does not let her emotions control her, but takes time to think rationally before acting.
A strong woman is quick to forgive even if she does not want to. She realizes it is okay to be vulnerable and show weakness at times. She is the first one to say "I'm sorry," even when it is hard to admit being wrong.
A strong woman is strong not because of what she says but what she does. Instead of saying hurtful things about others, she holds her tongue. She looks to always build up others, and never tear them down. She does not try and find approval or affirmation from others, but is secure in who she is already. If no one sees all the dishes she washes and toilets she scrubs, and loads of laundry she folds, she does not pity herself, because thankfulness and joy seeps out of her every being. She is not afraid to get her hands dirty.
And when she is so tired that she can barely keep her eyes open, she is still looking to serve and help others. Her husband knows that she is by his side and is being productive and fruitful with her time.
A strong woman is one of a kind, a rare treasure.
FEAR. It is amazing what we allow this four letter word to do in our lives. We allow it to make decisions for us. We allow it to hold us back in many areas of our lives. We allow it to control us.
I am so excited to start this cooking blog. It has been a thought in my mind for several months. Strangely enough, I have been afraid to start it. Afraid that no one will like it, afraid that I'm not a good enough cook, and the list goes on! I don't know how many times I have told myself, "this is a dumb idea - there are so many better cooks out there than me..."
Well...that is true. There are definitely many many MANY better cooks and chefs out there, but the bottom line is , I love to cook! And I want to share my favorite recipes, disasters, & stories with anyone who wants to read them. My main vision is to create a place to come and find simple, delicious recipes that don't break the budget!
So many of us have incredible talents and dreams hidden by fear, insecurity, & excuses, when all we have to is shove fear out of the way and move forward. It is easier than we build it up to be. Moving forward can include failure, disasters, train wrecks, & tears, but at least we are moving forward and not living life stagnant, which can mean inactive, sluggish, or dull! Are you catching my drift? I encourage you to look and see if fear, insecurity, or excuses may be holding you back from something, anything! Live life to it's fullest!